Soul Food

Everybody does “devotions” differently. Some have a Daily Bible reading plan they use. Some read a daily devotional that includes a brief Bible passage, a thought and a brief prayer. Some love playing “Bible roulette” - you know, close your eyes, open your Bible and insert finger. Wherever your index lands, well...there you go. I have used a variation of most of these (my few attempts at Bible roulette usually has led me to texts like Job 2:9: “Hast thou lost thine integrity? Curse God and die.” Yeah, not what you call the Good News Verse of the Day.) For many years, in addition to my regular Scripture reading, I have read from a book as well. It's never been a tome about parsing Greek verbs or something (although I know a few guys who actually enjoy that sorta thing.) It's usually a work that ministers to me at the soul level. Like, William Young's The Shack, Healing by Francis MacNutt or anything by Peterson like A Long Obedience in the Same Direction.

For several months now I have been trudging through Richard Foster's and Emilie Griffin Spiritual Classics: Selected Readings for Individuals and Groups on the Twelve Spiritual Disciplines. My mom, who essentially taught me to read and has kept me in books pretty much since, gifted it to me several Christmases ago and only this past school year have I decided to give her a go. As the subtitle suggests, its an archipelago of various readings from mystics, saints, pastors and church leaders over the centuries all focused on the twelve spiritual disciplines. Frankly, it's been tough sledding. Often dry and not very life-giving. I don't say it's Foster. It's just that what he thinks is good reading I find...er...dull...or truthfully, like I'm in over my head. Like a kindergartener who took a wrong turn and suddenly found himself in a fifth grade class. While I appreciate being exposed to the thoughts and musings of disciples I would normally not seek out my own, I often simply feel out of my depth. I mean he obviously believes that divines like Simone Weil, Karl Rahner, Dorothy Sayers and Frederick Buechner (to name four) having something to say about spiritual formation today, um...they do nothing for me. Why keep reading it then? Well...with only three more installments to go I might as well see it through.

And yesterday, for the first time in weeks, I was glad I did. For yesterday I read the words of a pastor who though he's been off the scene for over 200 years still speaks loudly and assuredly to me. We've all heard about John Wesley, a man of the 18^th Century who after being converted at a Moravian gathering on Aldersgate Street in London, over the scope of his career went on horseback over a quarter of a million miles preaching and delivering forty thousand sermons testifying of the grace of God that had saved him. The selection that Foster & Griffin include in Spiritual Classics is taken from one of the forty thousand message he wrote entitled The New Birth. Somehow listening to his words about a subject I have heard much about (and have spoke much about as well) was like water in a thirsty land.

...All the sins you have committed from your childhood right up to the moment when you were “accepted as his sons through Jesus Christ” (Eph 1:5) are driven away as chaff. They are gone. They are lost. They are swallowed up. They are remembered no more. You are now “born” from spirit (John 3:6). Why are you afraid? Why be troubled even about what happened before you were born? Throw away your fears! “For the spirit of God gave us is no craven spirit, but one to inspire strength, love and self-discipline” (2 Tim 1:7). Know your calling! Rejoice in God your Savior and give thanks to God your Father through Him...

...Some will say, “But I have once again done serious wrongs, even after receiving this redemption. I seem like a lost cause. I still feel deep remorse.” It is fitting that you feel a proportional remorse after doing wrong. For it is God who has awakened this very feeling in you. But you are now invited to transcend it in trust. Hasn't the Spirit also enabled you to say, “But in my heart I know that my vindicator lives, and that he will rise last to speak in court” (Job 19:25); and “the life I now live is not my life, but the life which Christ lives in me; and my present bodily life is lived by faith in the Son of God” (Gal 2:20). It is that faith that cancels all that is past, and in it there is no condemnation. At whatever time you truly believe in the name of the Son of God, all your sins prior to that time vanish like the morning dew...

...There is no condemnation for any inward sin still remaining in those who “walk by the Spirit.” Even though sin may seem to cling tenaciously to everything we do, we are not guilty as long as we do not give way to it. So do not be disturbed because ungodly imaginations remain in your heart. Do not feel dejection because you still come short of the glorious image of God, or because pride, self-will, or unbelief cling to all your words and works. Do not be afraid to face candidly all these distortions of your heart. Know yourself as you are known. Desire fervently of God that you may not think more highly of yourself than you ought to think. Let your continuous prayer be:

Show me, as my soul can bear,

The depth of inbred sin;

All the unbelief declare,

The pride that lurks within.

As God hears your prayer, he will let you see your heart. Then he will show you in entirety the spirit to which you belong. Then take care that your faith does not fail you, or that your protection is not torn from you. Now you are free to see yourself quite openly even at your lowest, to be humbled in the dust, to see yourself as nothing, less than nothing, and empty. At that very moment you may still “set your troubled hearts at rest, and banish your fears” (John 14:27). Remember that you, even you, have an Advocate “with the Father, Jesus Christ, and he is just” (1 John 2:1). Hold fast to the recollection that “as the heaven stands high above the earth” (Ps 103:11), so is God's love higher even than my sins...

...God is merciful to you, a sinner! Precisely the sinner you are! God is love, and Christ has died! That means: the Father himself loves you! You are his child! God will not withhold from you anything that is for your good. Is it not good that the whole body of sin, which is now crucified in you, should be destroyed? It shall be done! You will be cleansed “from all that can defile flesh or spirit” (2 Cor 7:1). Is it not good that nothing should remain in your heart but the pure love of God alone?...

...If you have stumbled, O seeker of God, do not just lie there fretting and bemoaning your weakness! Patiently pray: “Lord, I acknowledge that every moment I would be stumbling if you were not upholding me.” And then get up! Leap! Walk! Go on your way! “Run with resolution the race” in which you are entered (Heb 12:1)...

...Just love God who loves you. That is sufficient. The more deeply you love, the stronger you feel. And as soon as you have learned to love God with all your heart, “if you give fortitude full play you will go on to complete a balanced character that will fall short in nothing” (James 1:4)...

Though he has been gone since 1791, reading these words John Wesley still speaks a good word that I can apply to my life today. I'm so glad I can cease and desist from dwelling on what's wrong with me and focus primarily on what Jesus has done for me. The other day one of my runners charged out of the blocks for the 100 yard dash only to trip and turn head over heels while the other runners left him behind in their dust. But to his credit he did what we are all supposed to do when we stumble – pick ourselves up and get back in the race. In spiritual terms, we turn to Jesus, confess our sin and then – to quote Wesley - “...get up! Leap! Walk! Go on your way! [and] 'Run with resolution the race' in which [we] are entered (Heb 12:1).” Amen. Good word, John Wesley...and thanks!

"Why do we fall...? So we might learn to pick ourselves up."