For better or for worse: An open letter to someone I know who just got baptized

Baptism in the Red Cedar

[The acting governor of Egypt] ordered me to abandon my Christianity, assuming that if I were to change the rest would follow me. But I replied in effect, “We must obey God rather then men” [Acts 5:29], that I worship the only God and no other, and would never cease to be a Christian. At that he ordered us to leave for a village near the desert, called Cephro. - Dionysius, Bishop of Alexandria (Egypt) circa 251 AD 

So, yesterday you decided to follow Jesus in water baptism. Good for you. My only regret is that I could not be there to witness it. Despite how secular a country we are becoming there are still lots of people who profess Christian faith of one kind or another. But not everybody goes public with their profession. Some prefer to keep that on the “down-low” for fear that they will be perceived as being weird or goofy or, God-forbid, serious about their religion.

That was a great day

A few years ago I had the privilege of leading a man to Christ who by his own admission was a no-good drunk. When he was a kid, he had gone to church now and again but at 40 he hadn't been near one in a real long time. Like you, he prayed a prayer inviting Jesus Christ into his heart. And a month or so later he was baptized just like you were yesterday (although he got dunked in a lake not in an indoor pool). A little while later I overheard him sharing his story with someone else and this is how he explained it: “When I was born-again it was like I got engaged to Jesus. But when I got baptized it was like I got married to him.” I was struck by the language he used - “engaged”, “married” - he hadn't been a Christian long enough to pick up this kind of lingo by simply attending the weekly gatherings of our fellowship. No, Someone else had been instructing him because in that statement he was giving about as clear a definition of baptism that I can think of.

One day this will be you

One day far in your future you will mostly likely get married. And on that day people will gather to see you and your intended share vows with one another. It will be a day worth remembering for years to come because on that day you will “go public” with your devotion to the man you will one day call “husband.” He'll give you a ring and forever after when people see that on your left ring-finger they'll know, “well, she may be a look-er but she's off the market.” Creative as you are, you'll probably come up with your own vows but whatever you write they'll be an echo of the promises that couples have shared with each other time out of mind:

...to have and to hold...

...for better, for worse...

...for richer, for poorer...

...in sickness and in health...

...'til death parts us...

In other words, for always.

To be baptized is to say the same thing: To go public with what one guy refers to as the most important love relationship in your life; to make a statement to yourself and anyone else who happens to be paying attention that your heart belongs to Another. In some countries today that kind of profession comes at great price. People have been known to suffer bodily harm, economic hardship and emotional duress for publicly confessing Jesus as the Lord of their life. Jesus promised as much which is why he said, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me” which is to say he's in the driver seat not you. And if that's the case there may be times he may take you where you never planned on going or even chose to go. It comes with the territory of being a disciple of Jesus Christ in any day as Dionysius could tell you.

The man himself

Who was he? Dionysius was the recognized leader of the Church of Jesus in Alexandria, Egypt, which at the time was quite a hub of Christian faith. As part of the Roman Empire, there was always an imperial presence in the city a fact that usually didn't affect the Christians there at all. Until Decius (249 AD) became emperor and after him, Gallus (251 AD). These guys were the first emperors to implement an organized and systematic rounding-up of anyone who wouldn't take the empire-wide loyalty oath, “Caesar is Lord!” Usually that meant Christians and those who refused to swear by the Emperor paid the ultimate penalty, usually after enduring great suffering first. Of course, some weaseled out of it and publicly denied that they had any association with Jesus, took the oath but, as they would later claim, with their fingers crossed. Others had friends in high places who claimed that they had, in fact, taken the oath when in fact they hadn't. But there were always were and always will be those who will be stubborn about the right kinds of things when called upon, the “7000 who have never bent the knee to Baal” (see 1 Kings 19). Dionysius was one of them. When he refused to take the oath, he was banished from his home and sent to live in what eventually became a penal colony for Christians like himself. His response to the governor's demand was, in so many words, “I am a Christian for always.”

Which brings me back to the whole idea of baptism being something like marriage in that it's for always too. Anybody who has been married for awhile knows that every good marriage is ultimately a labor of love, in that you have to work at it. As wonderful as your husband will be he will, from time to time, stress you out perhaps to the degree that you may think to yourself, “Did I make a mistake? Did I promise too much? (Just know if that happens then you'll know for sure you're a married woman) But most likely you and your guy will talk it through and work it out, forgive and forget, and move on. Real love and devotion is like that – you stick with each other through thick and thin, good times and bad, for always.

Universal symbol for "spoken for"

Being a disciple of Jesus requires the same kind of love. In my opinion, there are a lot of people who don't have a problem with me or any other Christian doing “our thing.” But to follow Christ means more often than not you will feel out of place and out of step. The pressure will be to conform to the mentality and habits of your classmates or your future colleagues. You know, it's okay to be religious so long as you're not too serious about it. But in my mind that's like someone saying, “It's okay to be married just so you don't get carried away about it.” Is there really any other way to do marriage? If you're not all-in, why get married at all?

So may God bless you at this juncture of your life and may he give you the grace to continue to choose him when tempted to do things on the sly or to quit altogether. Remember, as much as you chose to follow him and publicly express your devotion to him yesterday he, first, chose you to be in relationship with him and will give you the grace to stick with him for better or for worse.